Vodka Christmas Cake

Once again this year, I’ve had requests for my Vodka Christmas Cake recipe so here goes. Please keep in your files as I am beginning to get tired of typing this every year! (Made mine this morning!!!)


1 cup sugar1 tsp. Baking powder
1 cup water1 tsp. salt
1 cup of brown sugarlemon juice
4 large eggsSome nuts
1 bottle vodka1 bottle vodka


Sample a cup of vodka to check quality

Take a large bowl

Check the vodka again to be sure it is of the highest quality then repeat.

Turn on the electric mixer.

Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.

Add 1 teaspoon of sugar.

Beat again.

At this point, it is best to make sure the vodka is still ok.

Try another cup just in case.

Turn off the mixer thingy.

Break 2 eegs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.

Pick the fruit up off the floor, wash it and put it in the bowl a piece at a time trying to count.

Mix on the turner. If the fried druit getas stuck in the beaterers, just pry it loose with the drewscriver

Sample the vodka to test for tonsisticity.

Next sift 2 cups of salt, or something.

Check the vodka.

Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.

Add one table.

Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink.

Whatever you can find.

Greash the oven.

Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.

Don’t forget to beat off the turner.

Finally, throw the bowl through the window.

Finish the vodka and wipe the counter with the cat.