Sunday Confession – Friends With Benefits

Sunday confession

I said I’m ok with being friends with benefits after the break-up. Truth is, the sex is fantastic, the spark and attraction will always be there, but I want more.  He made the decisions to break it off, I didn’t want to.  I’m still deeply in love and want more than sex, but I’m not ready to give the sex up either.  The heart and mind are waging war while my body waves the red flag in surrender.

FWB

 

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Sunday Confession – 16 and In Love

Sunday confession

Any advice for a sixteen year old boy who thinks he is in love for the first time? i am just…

Confused

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Sunday Confession – True Love

Sunday confession

Many many years ago I got married because I thought it was the thing to do. I thought that I was truly in love. We have had a good marriage. There has been a lot of fun times and some bad times. About a year after we got married my wife introduced me to a relative (cousin) of hers. I knew the moment I saw her she was the one I was meant to be with. I’ve kept these feelings to myself all these years because I did not want to hurt anyone, especially the person I promised my life to. Just recently I found out (probably deep down knew all along) that the cousin felt the same way about me. Over the years we have seen each other at family gatherings and have never communicated our true feelings for each other. Now that we know how each other feels it it very hard not to see each other. We share feelings and thoughts thru email. Neither of us want to hurt the person who introduced us to each other. I am truly happy for the first time in my life when we are talking. The cousin is the most beautiful and wonderful person I have ever met. When she walks into a gathering, I get a warm feeling all over and cannot stop smiling. I thought I knew what happiness was all along. I was wrong. Now I know. I don’t know how long I can keep this secret. I am just afraid to cause anyone any pain. I have always thought I would rather be unhappy myself than hurt someone else. I don’t know anymore. Never have I had these kind of feelings before. Totally confusing. Maybe it’s time to start thinking about me for a change.

Confused

 

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Sunday Confession – Missing My Friend

Sunday confession

Everyone around me is so damn Happy. In some ways I am also, but my best friend died this year, and all I want for Xmas is one more damn day with her. I’m not normally one of the Broken. I have a wonderful husband and awesome children, but I go off to hide every night to cry where they cannot see me. I don’t know how to fix this, and I do not know how the HELL I am supposed to like my life without her in it. There is this void in my heart that cannot be filled. I am not suicidal,  but if I didn’t wake up tomorrow? Maybe I would get to just see her again. Not gonna step out in front of a bus, but, while I don’t necessarily want to DIE, I don’t want to LIVE either. I feel like I am cheating on my Family with this pain. It’s a Catch-22. If I pretend that I am fine, I’m a liar. I go to work every day, I cook dinner every night, and I am happy taking care of them…then I wind down for the night and miss her so much.

Lost

 

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Sunday Confession – Stop Complaining

Sunday confession

I wish everyone would stop complaining and just be thankful.  My 18 year old daughter had scholarships to every college not only in America and abroad to be a surgeon, but had a breakdown and ran away.  Have not seen her in over a year.  My wife died at 42 three weeks before Christmas.  I have no family so I had to send my 16 year old daughter to England to stay with her aunt.  So this Christmas I will be alone.  So stop complaining and be thankful that you have family and show them you love them because life is short.

Alone

 

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Sunday Confession – Disappointed in Society

Sunday confessionSo many people in this country are pathetic. We have drivers that can’t drive and workers that don’t work. There are politicians that care more about power power power than they do their country. There are Businessmen who would gladly rip off their consumers left and right if it meant a little more money in the bank. We have corrupt governments, stupid media, annoying religions, and worst of all, people stuck in a position they hate but are doing NOTHING to remove themselves from it! How many people hate their spouse? How many hate their Boss? Their home, their car, their computer, even their effing pants. We have so many damn complainers who want everyone to give them the world and won’t lift a finger until it’s given to them. Then we have so many people with the power to give them their wishes, and promise to do so, and never do (Hey Obama voters, is he paying for your home or your insurance, yet?). Then we have people who just don’t care if they do damage to make money (from as minor a thing as beef jerky packages being less than half full, to buildings dedicated to selling deadly tobacco products and openly advertising it). 

If you don’t like something about your life, DO something about it! And don’t tell me you’re trapped, you worm. There’s always a way out, you’re just afraid of a little change and effort. If you truly want to accomplish something, it will be done.

And the Traffic! Good lord, I know I haven’t gotten any FASTER over the years, but somehow everyone else seems to have gotten slower and more timid. The hell is up with that? You don’t merge onto a 75 mph highway going 40, you don’t give a bicycle in the bike lane 6 feet of clearance (going into another lane to do so), you don’t drive 25 mph slower than every damn car around you, and you CERTAINLY don’t do it in the left lane! No one should ever BE passed on their right, or NEED to pass someone on the right. If you’re going less than 75 in the left lane and someone’s riding your ass, get the hell out of the way. You’re not teaching them a lesson, you’re not doing everyone a favor, stopping a menace in his tracks, you’re just a cause of road rage, and road rage can be deadly. And who knows? That man in the car behind you, flashing his brights and honking his horn, trying to get around your slow-ass might have an emergency, like his suicidal friend just ran away, or his father’s in the passenger seat, dying.

I don’t care if you drive carefully, in fact, I amend you for it. Just use some common sense (such as when merging onto a 75 mph highway) and stay out of the left lane.

~Society, I am disappoint.

</rant>

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Sunday Confession – No One Cares

Sunday confession

No one cares. I am a driver, a printer of papers, a supplier of lunch money. I never get a nice thank you, I am not included in events and parties. I live totally anonymously among my family. My kids don’t care, my spouse never talks to me. He says no one wants me nor would ever want me because I am fat, old and ugly. I love God and I try to love everyone as He tells us to, yet there is no change in anyone close to me. I have cancer and I try to be a part of everything my kids do because I never know when I will not be able to be there. The only thing that keeps me alive is the fact that if I was not here, my husband would have to raise my children. This is not acceptable but I am miserable with no hope left in my future. I don’t know how to go on anymore. Yes-I have had professional help,their options: accept it, change it (which I can’t), or leave it (which I can’t). I have to accept this, I just don’t know how to do that.

 

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Sunday Confession – Fed Up

I am fed up with my wife and kids, but feel that I have no options to do anything about it.  My wife ignores me and has guy friends that she is more interested in than me, but she insists that there is nothing going on.  And my kids… getting them to be any kind of respectful is something that I doubt will ever happen.  I want out, but feel I have no choice but to stay.

Stuck

 

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