Floyd the Rooster…

Floyd the rooster costs a lot of money, but the farmer decides he’ll be worth it. So he buys Floyd. The farmer takes Floyd home and sets him down in the barnyard–then gives the rooster a pep talk.

“I want you to pace yourself now. You’ve got a lot of chickens to service here, and you cost me a lot of money. Consequently, I’ll need you to do a good job. So take your time and have some fun,” the farmer said, with a chuckle.

Floyd seemed to understand, so the farmer pointed toward the hen house and Floyd took off like a shot. WHAM! Floyd nailed every hen in the hen house, three or four times. The farmer was flabbergasted

After that the farmer heard a commotion in the duck pen. Sure enough, Floyd was there.

Later, the farmer saw Floyd after a flock of geese by the lake. Once again, WHAM! Floyd got all the geese.

By sunset the farmer saw Floyd in the field chasing quail and pheasants. The farmer was distraught and worried that his expensive rooster wouldn’t last even 24 hours. The farmer went to bed.

When he awoke the next day, he found Floyd on his back–stone cold in the middle of the yard. Vultures were circling overhead. The farmer, saddened by the loss of such a colorful and expensive bird, shook his head and said

“Oh, Floyd, I told you to pace yourself. I tried to get you to slow down, now look what you’ve done to yourself.”

Floyd opened one eye, nodded toward the vultures circling in the sky and said, “Shhh! They’re getting closer.”

Thanks, Nutters