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You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character.
Her Wedding dress – $5000. Your Tux rental – $100.
People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch (or fart)is practically expected.
New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one small suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he/she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
Your belly usually hides your big hips.
One wallet and one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.